Friday, April 22, 2011

Romeo a.k.a. Guhan

Long long ago (2008), my friend Gayathri chanced upon Romeo. He first laid his eyes on her orkut profile when gayu n me were still in high school. And he at once fell for her. He loved her truly even though he didnt even know what she looked like or sounded like. A love so pure. I have reproduced his love emails sent to her late 2008. I swear on science that I've altered nothing.
For readers who do not know Tamil:
"chellam" means darling/sweetheart. "jollu" essentially means to drool; in this context it is to drool over someone.

Mail 1:
am not so cute and so bad,i think i am
enough with this.how r u dear?even i dont know y i like to talk with u.but
my heart loves u.i am very glucky person to have friendship with
u.inneyveli were is ur house?my name guhan doing
b.sc c.s at trichy.my house in near cbs busstand.when i say truely i have no
many girl friends.only two.do u have google talk?were is ur house in
neyveli.i am very fond of meeting u.if u like we can meet or leave it.as u
r from my city i am very eager to meet u dear gayu.wat r u doing?now r u
staying in chennai?mobile no. is 9791701477 u call to this no. and ask to
talk with guhan.we can talk.waiting for ur call dear.dont cheat me.pls
gayu.shal i call u chellam?bcz i like to call as same.with love
guhan.

Mail 2:
how r u dear?wat is there in my scrap to u.i have not wrote any jollu.my
heart loves u means dont think me wrong i coming to tell that i like
u.ok.how r u?how is ur face?can u send me a photo pls dear.my photo will be
displayed in orkut soon.ok.i may not be cute.but my heart is cute.even u
may
hate me,if u saw me.u may avoid to talk even.anyhow i like to be ur
friend.were is ur housew in neyveli.when will u bye own mobile?atleast call
me monthly thrice from any other pone pls.beg u dear.i not know why i like
u.but when i scrap u and mail u i became very happy not know why.that
means wat?sy straight u like me?love
me?means u like me.dont get angry.tell truely from ur heart .waiting for
u.pls shall we meet one tim alone pls.beg u dear.send me ur photo to my
mail.if u like me truely.

Mail 3:
chellam enda reply panla?how r u?i love u da?wat r u doing dear?waiting for
ur reply.then u love me?tell me straight.ok.waiting dear,.

----
However, Juliet never returned Guhan's love; Not even to one email. sniff.
Buy, everyone.

2 comments:

Karthik Manamcheri said...

hahahaha .. this is the funniest shit .. thanks for sharing

Born a Maverick said...

God oh god.. now i know what to read when i'm down and out